Found Waldo, that sneaky piece of shit.

Any sports reporter who doesn't use the word “impactful” at least once per broadcast gets a formal reprimand.

Very upbeat since finding out that a positive attitude never helped anyone.

Hey you kids with your tattoos and iPods, you know what's really cool? Good posture.

I pitched a movie where something good happens. It was rejected as requiring too much of a suspension of disbelief.

If your religion forbids you from getting vaccinated, switch to a healthier religion.

If you're going to comment, do some goddamn research first

Damn, some of you are oooooooooooooooooooold

I see more and more people I follow locking their Twitter accounts, and I assume it's because of garbage people. Stay strong.

Apologies for the pro-vaccine deluge, but I am beyond over these dumb guys who think they're smart promoting anti-vaxx propaganda. I want my life back, and these people and their supporters are responsible for blocking that.

I end every conversation with “All we had to do was wear masks in March.”