Things are so incredibly perverse right now, it will take years to normalize being normal again.
Oh look, I'm in a bad mood again. Shocking.
This tweet is just one of my Bonus Tracks.
I refuse to get a Beastie Boys song stuck inTERGALATIC PLANETARY PLANETARY INTERGALACTIC
Still time today for one more public figure to do incalculable damage to our public health.
People will never need your attention more urgently than when you are about to finally kill the boss in a video game.
Yes. Yes. That's it…Keep liking them… as you get ever closer to the poison tweet…
If believing in life after love is a crime, then you better go ahead and arrest me and Cher.
Most of the accounts I've blocked have used either “hubs” or “Toby Keith” non-ironically.
I have come here to chew bubblegum. And I'm all out of bubblegum.
Food masquerading as other food makes me sick. Be who you are, zucchini. But stay the hell out of my bread.
Looking forward to moving toward a completely emoji-based economy.